Monday, January 11, 2016

Cameron's giant plan for unaffordable housing

The Prime Minister has electrified the country with his pledge this week to "build the paupers out of London."

Responding to a long-standing demand for unaffordable housing, Mr Cameron said, "It is time to clear out the riff-raff. They've cluttered up the place for far too long."

"There's just too much money to be made," he added. "We have to make our capital safe for foreigners, and make their capital safe as well."

"To those who worry about diluted standards in a building boom, let me say that safety is our first concern. There is no Council or Parliamentary seat safer for the Conservatives than one where the absentee owners can't vote Labour and the tenants won't. High-priced flats are a win for them and a win for us."

His parting remark, "Let's see how John Healey likes that" is taken to refer to the shadow housing minister's mooted plan for a programme of new social housing.

We contacted a number of property developers known to make political donations to the Tories, but they were unable to comment as they all fainted from greed on hearing the news.


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3 comments:

James Higham said...

Who'd live in London these days?

Paddington said...

But who will clean their houses? It is worth noting that the early movement to the London suburbs excluded the poor by high rail prices. Now they want the opposite.

A K Haart said...

We need a capable opposition with a capable leader.